Day three of the new nanny job:

I got up a little late this morning and checked my e-mail before heading off to the central Phoenix home where I was to watch a set of 1-year-old twins and their 2 1/2-year-old brother. I haven't been there completely alone, save for a few hours here, and there and I have to confess it's strange to have half the parental unit present at all times. Not that I do anything differently, it just feels as if someone is constantly peering over your shoulder or listening in on a private conversation you're having. On top of that, you're never able to really form that bond with the kids because mom's always around somewhere. Regardless, the job is hard, the hours are long and I'm exhausted when I get home, usually accompanied by a dull headache.

Glad I'm not a parent yet.

Yes, it'll be great when we do have kids but sheesh! It's a lot of flippin' work with three toddlers running around. The brother is always kicking or grabbing or hitting his little sisters if they make the slightest move toward his toys or do something he doesn't like, or walks too close to him...fill in the blank from here. Anything. So you always have to watch him if his sisters are nearby. Both girls have bowel movement problems---i.e. their excrement comes out hard as a rock and they scream like you wouldn't believe while they try to push it out. And there's NOTHING you can do except comfort them and try to get them to drink some liquids. Fun times.
When they're happy, it's great. Their smiles and giggles are uplifting even when you're drained and it's so far beyond your comprehension of wonderful when they hug you or smile and walk to you with outstretched arms.

I was talking to my husband yesterday about all the work it is to take care of the twins, mostly that you're doing everything for them all the time. They're babies. But the biggest thing God brought to mind, while I was feeding the little ones green baby food (what manufacturers sell as "peas"), that it would feel horrible to be described as a "baby" in your Christian walk after years of following. Think about it. Your leaders are sitting in front of you, waiting for you to open your mouth while you gaze disconnectedly behind them and pretend to enjoy the food being shoved in your mouth one bite at a time.
I remember when I was a teen back in my high school youth group. I was pretty typical in that I wanted to be a good person and do everything right, I wanted to go to church every Sunday (mostly to see my friends) and I wanted to go to the youth conventions and camps to see my friends who lived further away (oh yeah, and meet boys). My youth pastors at the church tried so hard to get us involved in the group, so that we wouldn't just walk away when it came time to decide between school friends and functions and church events. Being that I wanted to be a good person and have a good crowd of friends, I bit. I went to the functions and had the basic beliefs that Christ died on the cross for me to forgive me of my sins so I wouldn't rot eternally in hell (okay, a little too descriptive, but it was how I felt). I knew that in my Christian circle that I shouldn't do drugs, have sex or cuss people out.
But that was about as deep as it went for me.
Until I read the Bible.

One Sunday during "big church" at my very small church, we had even lower attendence than usual so my pastor decided to round us up and sit in the church seats and chat about the feeding of the five thousand. I had heard the stories millions of times before, since I was little and the Sunday school teacher would have us color Jesus and the little boy and the loaf of bread and few fish he had.
But this day was different. I found out that the story appeared in more than one book of the Bible. And I had no clue.
Suddenly at 17-years-old I realized that I knew nothing about this book that I claimed to base my life after. If someone had asked me any trivia question related to the Bible, odds are good that unless the question were along the lines of "What did God create Eve out of?" I would have failed. (slightly overstated, but very close to the truth)
So I began reading the Bible and realizing that many of the stories that it held were actually very interesting. And entertaining. And enlightening.
When I began preparing for the International Youth Convention to be held in Florida the summer of my senior year of high school, I decided to stick to my devotions, really listen to the speakers and, for once, not focus on the social aspect.
It worked.
I began to grow and the baby formula turned into pureed peas. Then bread, and so on.

I can't say that I'm a spiritual giant or anything or even that I could pass a trivia game on Bible stories with ease, but I know for a fact now that the Bible is my truth, it is my food and I'm not a baby anymore.
And hopefully, I'm more than a teenager. But it's always going to be something I need to focus on, pay attention to and work at more. My Savior is waiting for me to respond to His Word, so that I can grow even more each day.